Half an anniversary...

  I know I wasn´t blogging for months now, life is just one crazy thing. Sometimes you look back and notice, that nothing special happened the last months. I mean, of course you celebrated birthdays, went out, met your friends, but it was just your everyday life going on. Not that this would be bad, not at all.

My life was pretty much like this the last years. Settled in, planned. Today is the best reminder, that many many things can change in half a year. Life can turn from precisely planned to having no plan at all, from feeling save to loosing your mind, from knowing what you definitely don´t want to doing exactly those things.

I´d never have believed if somebody told me back on New Year´s Day about all the things that happened since. I never thought the last six months could be so filled up with life, may it be the good or the bad days.

And therefore, this first new entry is for you, my darling...

Dear Aaron,

 

 half a year ago a car stopped and  - apart from everything a girl is taught by her mother from the cradle - I jumped in. You changed my life from the very first second and I´m blessed and thankful that you´re by my side. I hate the seperation we have to go through and sometimes it feels unbearable to miss you just one more day, knowing that it will be 365 days more to miss you. But there are those moments where I find myself thinking about you and starting to smile, just because my heart knows you´re somewhere out there. Even from a 5000 miles distance you can send me those perfect moments, no matter what´s happening around. Thank you for being my anchor in every storm and loving me on days I wasn´t very lovable. I wish I could give you just one kiss today... I love you.

That week - Part 3 - Love?

Love hits you when you least expect it.
When you´re barefooted and unprepared.
Love grabs you and sucks you in.
Love challenges you more than you think you can take.
It twists you around until you can hardly breathe.
Love forces you to choose heart over mind.
Love hits you and you´ve got just to fall.
You have to trust that you will be gently catched up by that one whose heart is beating for you.
If love treats you good it will come up all right in the end.

That week - Part 2 - a unique weekend getaway

 Either way I had to leave town for 3 days to go for my studies. On the one hand this was just the worst timing ever. I´m going there once a month and this has to be exactly in that week?? That´s just not fair. On the other hand this was the only week in over a year where classes finished at Saturday noon instead of Saturday evening. It´s that one exception in my master´s programme that gave me the chance of being home on Saturday evening. With Aaron´s flat all empty and still lots of things to cope with, we set out for our own weekend romance and booked a nice hotel in our town.

via

via

We had a nice stay in that beautiful hotel, I wish I´d had more time and my camera with me.Aaron created that tiny adorable mini bar outside the window. Blame me for the bad pic :)

Will tell you more about my outfit for Sat night in a what-I-wore-post soon :)

xoxo,
Bridy

That week - Part 1 - Lunch can´t hurt...

 

Usually when I sit here - at the other side of the weekend - I just don´t know what to tell, because everything seems just so ordinary in my life. I´m just like every other girl, you know? But the whole last week was one unexpected rollercoaster drive. I never thought that something like that would happen to me. Nor have I ever thought that this could happen to anyone.

If you´re following my blog you know that I had a date Tuesday last week with some guy I met at an online dating site - which took place exactly the time I´m writing this seven days ago. And when I think about that fact I can hardly believe this was just a week ago, because sometimes it feels like it´s been a month since then, sometimes it feels like it´s just a dream that never happened. But no way this was just one week ago...

You know I asked Aaron out for a date, because the time we were texting I had that special feeling about him. It´s something you can´t describe, let´s call it intuition. He was totally caught off guard by me asking him out. And I was surprised by myself that I did. I haven´t been out for a date for years and well, you know... usually the woman get´s asked out. It´s a bit strange to ask a guy for a date.

We met for lunch (and a coffee...and a walk...and another coffee) and I felt so comfortable around him. Then he told me he´d be leaving Germany in a week and go back to the States. He though dated me because he thought lunch can´t hurt. I mean that was... unexpected. Upsetting unexpected. How likely is it that you meet a guy you´ve been texting with for just two days and who turns out matching to you in so many ways? I don´t wanted it to end so shortly after it started. That was just not fair.

I thought with Aaron leaving so soon we wouldn´t see each other again. But life had other plans. The set of our second date was me picking up pizza, going to his flat, watching a movie with him while the movers where packing in all of his things around us. We spent the whole day together, getting closer to each other though we knew there would be a deadline to this soon. That night I left with such a mingled feeling. Should I listen to what my mind was telling me what is smart?  - Run as fast as you can and stay away, you just get hurt! Or should I listen to what my heart was telling me and what I was about to do anyway? And would I be able to let go all fears and all worries in that short time? I mean that first days of dating and get to know each other should be unburdened, light-hearted and easy-going. And part of our days were perfectly like that. But we had to face so many serious things as well. We had one week to find out what we wanted. What all of this unexpected coincidences were leading us to. We were forced to be open-hearted so soon and maybe this just made that thin bond between us stronger.